Placenta-Pro--Worst Soft Drink Ever
Placenta-Pro is a Japanese soft drink made from 100% horse placenta. That's right, no pig placenta here. According to their "concepts" page, horse placenta has 300 times more amino acids than pig placenta. Take that, Mountain Dew.
Placenta-Pro comes in two varieties--Orange and Black. The black stuff is more concentrated, "harvested while the afterbirth is still potent." I'm getting light-headed...
What Placenta-Pro claims to do is truly amazing. Here are just a few of its purported benefits:
- Whitens skin (is that a good thing?)
- Cures headaches and canker sores
- Loosens stiff shoulders
- Reduces sensitivity to cold
- Makes you hungry (not me!)
You're supposed to drink one bottle every day--no more, no less. The Orange variety will run you around $50 per bottle. Black is a whopping $300 per bottle--that's almost $110,000 per year!!!
Sadly, Placenta-Pro Black sold out, so you'll have to make do with Orange.
I'm not feeling well.
--Spanno
Becky on March 26, 2009 at 07:48 AM
I think that stuff is good as a hair conditioner maybe?
Bob on March 26, 2009 at 08:20 AM
Goes to show you that a fool is born everyday.
John on March 26, 2009 at 11:35 AM
All the things a zombie just starting out needs.
sirald66 on March 26, 2009 at 12:15 PM
/me vomits a little
Mary Jeanne Cincotta on March 26, 2009 at 12:47 PM
With all of the great advancements in stem cell research that avoids the ethical problems with embryonic stem cells—why isn't anyone addressing the TRUE reason as to why the proponents of embryonic stem cell research want these ethical concerns abolished—that is....
There is TOO MUCH $$$ to be made in the industry of Designer Babies and in-vitro fertilization (the process of obtaining embryos from people), and that these industries are actually pushing for this nonethical legislation....?
Let's see, they get placenta's for free a the hospital, eggs are bought from any willing college girl, sperm banks for sperm, and uteruses are being extracted in the name of "health" from menopausal women. Does anyone else want to conjecture that THEY ARE ALREADY cloning people?!?!
Jason on March 26, 2009 at 01:01 PM
Mary, WTF are you talking about? This has nothing to do with embryonic stem cell research, women's rights, cloning people, etc. Please go back to your padded room.
CakeSpy on March 27, 2009 at 09:25 AM
NO BUENO.
Bill Woods on March 27, 2009 at 01:43 PM
"... 100% horse placenta. That's right, no pig placenta here."
So it's kosher?
Xanthippas on March 28, 2009 at 09:14 AM
Wow, all that AND it makes you hungry. I do not see a future for Diet Placenta Pro.
Dave on November 26, 2009 at 07:25 AM
Bob Shouldnt that be "a Foal is born everyday"
Dave on November 26, 2009 at 08:16 AM
More "foal" you if you buy that, its a waste of money
livermoron on January 25, 2010 at 09:38 AM
Do they make a decalf version?
Michelle Nathaniel on January 27, 2010 at 10:38 AM
That is DISGUSTING!!!! And, Jason's right, Mary go back to your looney bin.
rudy on December 20, 2011 at 05:52 AM
Here in Japan you can buy 10 bottles for around $55.