Cop Assaulted by M&Ms--Clean-Hand Defense Fails
by Spanno on May 12, 2008
A college student attempted to bring down Johnny Law by pelting him with M&Ms. This drunk daring revolutionary's voice was quickly silenced.
"Sean McGuire was arrested early Sunday at a convenience store after Drake University security guards noticed the colored candies falling on the ground around the officer. When the officer turned around, an M&M hit his shoulder, according to a police report."
I prefer to assail The Man and his jack-booted thugs with Skittles. The rainbow metaphor is easier to get across (I'm protesting the military-industrial complex on behalf of all races and nationalities) and they taste like crap. I wouldn't want to waste M&Ms like that.
--Spanno
Andrew Lale on May 13, 2008 at 12:51 PM
About twenty years ago, I was riding the bus home on the top deck of a double decker. It was a very hot, sweaty day, and the bus got stuck in a jam. A woman in front of me started smoking. I happened to be playing with a rolled up price tag (the teeny tiny paper ones supermarkets use), and flicked it at her in annoyance. It arched perfectly and hit her on the back of the head. She was not happy. She said she was going to have me arrested for assault, at which everybody on the top deck laughed uproarously, and she turned back around sheepishly. I win!
Esbiem on May 13, 2008 at 02:25 PM
As A.C. McAuliffe, Commander U.S. Armed Forces, stated to his German counterpart seeking his surrender while under seige during the Battle of the Bulge, "Nuts!”
steve watt on May 14, 2008 at 01:28 AM
About twenty years ago, I was riding the bus home on the top deck of a double decker. It was a very hot, sweaty day, and the bus got stuck in a jam. A woman in front of me started smoking. I happened to be playing with a rolled up price tag (the teeny tiny paper ones supermarkets use), and flicked it at her in annoyance. It arched perfectly and hit her on the back of the head. She was not happy. She said she was going to have me arrested for assault, at which everybody on the top deck laughed uproarously, and she turned back around sheepishly. I win!