Curtailing the Barbershop Beer
I can admit it--I used to have a scraggly ponytail kind-of-a-thing going. A really unattractive hairdo (though I feel I’m slagging the word “hairdo” by associating it with what I had at the time) which I wore mostly because I was working at a bar more than going to school, this was during undergrad days, and thought that an extra 5 minutes of sleep was more important than stopping off to get a haircut. I also had a Castro-esque beard for the same reason, but the hair, and that nasty, wanna-be-English-major ponytail, are center stage here. My manager at the bar hated it (it scared customers, too), and told me he’d pay be $10 to go across the street to our neighborhood barber and get a haircut. Finally, to get him off my back as much as to fancy up, I did go over after an afternoon shift to Roy’s Barbershop, which was a traditional one-seat shop, a place where older and younger folks would hang out and talk before getting their hair cut, maybe read a magazine or two, tell jokes, and generally form a community. Of course Roy (who I’d poured a drink for many times) was excited to rid me of the offending hair, and of course my manager followed me over to make sure the pony tail actually went by the wayside. Between us, I hadn’t been to get a haircut in a while, and having someone there watching over the cutting made me a little nervous. But Roy, following the lineage of many great barbers, handed me a Miller High Life when I sat down, handed one to my manager, started off with a “man walks into a bar” joke, and brought the room together. Walking out, I not only looked better, but felt better. I also realized when looking in the mirror that my hair had been an affront to nature, and I’ve had short hair since. Then, today, I read an article on Mlive.com that the attorney general of Michigan recently wrote a five-page ruling to stop Jude’s Barbershop in Grand Rapids from giving a beer to of age customers. I’m sure somewhere the owner of Supercuts is chuckling, but me, it just made me sad. First, doesn’t the attorney general of Michigan have better things to spend his time on? And second, why is it that a PG movie can teach kids 20 ways of bloodletting, but a barbershop can’t hand out a beer? What’s next? Is someone going to bust a doctor for handing out lollipops?
--A.J. Rathbun
Harl Delos on March 27, 2008 at 01:17 PM
I think the idea is that it's OK to give a beer to an of-age friend, but if you're serving beverage alcohol to a customer, you're operating a tavern, whether you're giving haircuts, selling cars or whatever.
The "world's greatest salesman" at Merollis Chevrolet in Detroit wrote that he would ask the customer if he wanted a cigarette, and if the guy said sure, he'd ask what he usually smoked, and he'd toss the guy a whole pack of cigs. Likewise, he'd offer the guy a drink. His theory was "you're a hell of a good guy, I'm a hell of a good guy, you know you're going to buy a car from someone, so why the hell don't you buy it from me?" and he sold a LOT of cars that way.
But still, the drink and the cigs weren't really free. It was a package deal - some cigs, some hooch, a friendly handshake, your trade in, and payments forever in exchange for a new Impala.
It's a shame politicians don't read that book. There's more than one out there that think they can get your vote by being nasty to their opponent. That's not how it works, folks. People vote for someone they like.
GR Brit on March 28, 2008 at 07:34 AM
That's a real shame. It seems that if there is no transaction directly related to the beer then it shouldn't require a liquor license. Is it the location or the relationship that causes the problem? I mean, if a friend of the owner shows up, do they have to step off the premises before the owner can offer his friend a beer?
I was about to post a rant at MI Live, when I saw that the user Freude had beaten me to it, echoing my sentiments precisely:
"Isn't it good that our governing authorities have eliminated all crime, fixed all the potholes in our streets, created the best schools in the country and turned Grand Rapids into a paradise so they have time to protect its citizens from the threat of free beer. Why do we allow morons to govern us?"
phismi on March 28, 2008 at 09:38 AM
While that does seem like the "grownups" stepping in to ruin everyone's good time (as long as the barber isn't in his cups, I say let it ride) I am mostly disappointed that this entry was not accompanied by a photograph of the author in his long-haired "Castro-esque" phase.
Porkov on March 29, 2008 at 04:55 PM
Similar incident - in Rabbit Hash, KY, the state has banned the mayor from the general store. (Google "rabbit hash mayor banned") Some smug prig complained, and the Law went into Javert mode. Many of the locals and other patrons who visit this landmark are unhappy about the heavy-handed abuse of power and consider it an affront to canine people everywhere. As for me, it makes me want to see a few bureaucrats put to sleep.
el duderino on March 29, 2008 at 06:40 PM
Harl Delos is right, businesses should be forbidden from offering their clients some modicum of hospitality. If left unchecked, the rubes in cabbage patch might end up in a new car they have to pay for or a haircut. These poor folks need to be protected from predatory barbers and the like.
on March 29, 2008 at 08:16 PM
To answer your question, yes, doctors are now being discouraged from handing out lollipops in my local Kaiser office. The nurses think it's pretty ridiculous, but my son got shots recently and I asked if they had any and they said no. Something about the childhood obesity crisis. Yeah, my two-year-old understands that.
on March 29, 2008 at 08:18 PM
To answer your question, yes, doctors are now being discouraged from handing out lollipops in my local Kaiser office. The nurses think it's pretty ridiculous, but my son got shots recently and I asked if they had any and they said no. Something about the childhood obesity crisis. Yeah, my two-year-old understands that.